Help!

Everybody needs some help from time to time. There are some things you can't do on your own, some things that require guidance from someone who knows more, and some things for which you just require some encouragement to keep moving.

No man (or woman) is an island, so promoting good relationships with the people you look to for help is a requirement. The other requirement is to know who to choose when you're needing a partner for a change or to acheive a goal. For some things you'll simply need help...any willing heart or pair of hands will do. For some things, however, you'll need support. What's the difference? A person who can help you responds to your direction. A person who can support you contributes by offering direction to you that they have gained through direct experience.

Let's say you're going to move from your home. You've done it before...you just need some help. First things first when moving - you call whomever you know who has a truck and nothing to do on a Saturday and promise to buy them pizza when you're all done. Your truck friend shows up Saturday morning eager to be of assistance. You ask him to help you load the couch in the truck and he says "I've never moved before...I don't know what to do." (must be the reason he was so eager to work for pizza) So you direct him with the help you need...."just pick up the other end of the couch and walk out the door to the truck with me."

What if you've never moved before, though? Not such a great idea to enlist the help of someone else who's never done it either. Before you ask for help, you need support....information and guidance from someone who is familar by experience....you need a "been there, done that" type of person. You may be able to find support from someone you know. You may need to look outside of your circle for support. The important thing when looking for support is to ask the right questions to ensure that you've found the right resource. Often times support requires an investment. If you pay the wrong person (or business or group) for support only to find out later that they don't have the experience and knowledge to support you, you will be frustrated...and have a lighter wallet. Frustration often leads to abandoning changes or the pursuit of goals. When looking for support, ask questions and get details before you bring someone into your circle and trust them for direction.

Never hire a marriage counselor who's never been married or a dog trainer that's never owned a dog. Either one, though, would be qualified to help you move if they had a truck.